The big day is coming to an end and my Moonpie is no longer a baby anymore, she’s on her way to being a toddler….
I can honestly say I have very mixed emotions about it all, I love watching her grow from that tiny baby into a cheeky little madam but it’s just so fast, I feel like I’m going to blink and bam! She’s 18 and moving out.
I only plan on having one child (there’s no way I could cope with more than one and the mum’s that do … well your superheroes) so I just want time to stand still a little and really enjoy our time together since I’m only going to do all of this once.
The day was a quiet, we had my dad come up to see Moonpie in the morning and open presents and my aunt in the afternoon … we don’t have much contact with my family since my mum past away, we go months without seeing or even speaking to each other. It’s hard and upsetting but that’s life unfortunately.
In the evening we popped over to the other half’s parents house to open more presents and do the birthday cake. It was a full house, Moonpie’s aunts, uncle and cousins were all there too and it does get quite manic at times with all the kids together, but Moonpie absolutely adores the boys and they adore her too.
To top off a week of birthday fails, when it came to the cake we had to use a 2 candle and I had to relight it as it went out while waiting for everyone to get ready.
Overall this 1st birthday has been eventful to say the least but we got through it and she had a wonderful time
Happy 1st Birthday Moonpie, we love you to the moon and back.
So you’re sitting down having the standard baby chat with a friend/family member, kids playing quite happily in the background and then it happens…
“Is she walking yet?” “no not yet” ” oh isnt she almost one ? Mine was up and running about by 10 months.” the dreaded comparison which makes you wonder why your little one hasn’t yet and is there anything wrong, are you not encouraging them enough ect..
We’ve all had it done to us and we are all guilty of doing it, whether we are aware of it or not. But it’s the people who intentionally compare children and in a negative way that drives me insane.
Every child is different and we should celebrate that instead of putting pressure on them and ourselves to conform to people’s expectations, so what if my Moonpie is a year old and isn’t walking yet!? She will when she’s good and ready, I’m not going push her to ether… it’s one thing encouraging and practicing certain skills when she wants to as well, but I will not force her to overpractice when she’s clearly had enough just because of other peoples unrealistic standards and negative outlook.
I want to enjoy our time together and not ruin it with needless pressure from ridiculous expectations and what is considered the “norm.”
I mean when does it stop ?? we do it from the time they are born right up until they are adults, so in a way from the get go we are setting them up to fail if we carry on comparing our children and putting these ridiculous pressures and over the top high standards on them.
Moonpie is who she is and will do things at her own pace and I wouldn’t wanr her to be any other way.
Highly strung mum
From an early age my family have always referred to me as the “highly-strung” one, So i’m nowhere near the right person to organise a birthday party..
We had decided to throw a softplay party for Moonpies first birthday and it wasn’t even a proper party really but i still stressed myself out to the point of a panic attack (ridiculous I know.)
I just had a vision of what her birthday would be … a fun day out at a soft play centre with close family and friends and then down to her grandparents house to spend time with everyone, open presents and then sing happy birthday while she blew out the candle on a homemade personalised cake.
Of course its turn out completely different, (much to my dismay ) last night while looking up prices for the softplay we had intended to use, I discovered that it was not open to the public on a Saturday! ! So I went into complete panic mode frantically messaging the other half and sister in law trying to figure out what to do … I picked another softplay I liked the look of from a list my sister in law sent me and quickly change the venue thinking nothing else cold go wrong… Fast forward to Saturday afternoon, we’re on our way to the venue when we receive a phone call from one of the guests who arrived early, there was an hour wait to get in and they were turning people away at the door ! My stress levels went from a 4 to 10 and I started to panic. We quickly decided that we had no other option but to go to the pub my brother works at earlier then we had planned as they were holding an event with jungle animals (monkeys ect.)
But as my mum used to say everything happens in threes …. the animals didn’t turn up.
The end result
So in the the end we spent the afternoon in the pubs side room with all the kids running wild, the mum’s wanting to pull their hair out and the dad’s conveniently realising the rugby was on and crowding together at the bar…
But do you know what? in the end it didn’t matter, Moonpie had no idea what was going on at all, but she was happy and enjoyed all the attention, everyone that came mattered and that was enough for me.
Tomorrow is the actual big day and we will be at her grandparents having a quiet day with family and cake…
The morals of the story are : always plan far ahead, keep things simple and always expect the unexpected.
Ok so technically I’m not a single mum anymore but i still feel that I am due to me and the other half not living together and him working alot.
But for the first four months it was just me and I had to do it all, the dreaded night time feeds, the countless nappy changes and dealing with the boredom of not knowing what to do with myself when she was asleep since there was no one else around to interact with.
It was very lonely at times, people would visit but that was very few and far between. It was also extremely tiring, most days I didn’t feel human and just went through the motions. But it was also so rewarding once Moonpie started developing and hitting her milestones, like the first time she smiled.
It was just me and her sitting in the front room around 6.30 in the morning on new years day, I was feeling so down, tired and almost in tears when I noticed her stiring, bottle in hand I leaned over her carry cot smiling, she looked back at me and gave me the most beautiful little smile. my heart could of bursted, her first smile and it was just for me.
It was so rewarding whenever she would hit a new milestone, I felt proud because I knew she was thriving and developing well and that was down to me. I also feel like we have a very strong bond because of the time we had together just us.
However there is nothing better then seeing her with her dad, they both dote on each other so much and I’m so happy that he’s taken a much more active role in her life in the last few months and thats happen regardless of us being in a relationship and will continue to whatever happens between us. I’m a firm believer of children having both parents in their life whether there together or not.
I’m not a very Christmassy person anymore, had a string of horrible Christmas’ that have tainted the whole experience for me but I don’t want ruin it for Moonpie, after all Christmas is mainly for the kids and I want her to enjoy it as much as I used too.
I know she’s still too little to understand but I want to start making our own traditions now as well as carrying on a few from my childhood.
We didn’t have many traditions but the ones we did were lovely, the advent calendars (to be honest everyone has this one I think), decorating the tree (although my mum really did this one alone, she would let us hang a few ornaments under supervision.) specific decorations that came out every year with out fail… two snow globes, one was a snowman and the other was father Christmas, tree ornaments that me and my siblings had made, plastic wall decorations and a very old angel that sat on top of the tree. My dad’s sides Christmas party was always fun,getting to see my grandparents, all my cousins, aunts and uncles under one roof (there’s alot of us.) Another was spending Christmas eve day with my dad’s side of the family and then seeing my mums side on boxing day. we were allowed to open one small present in the evening.
My favourite however was on Christmas morning before we opened any presents, we would all sit down with hot chocolate, a bacon sandwich and special Christmas biscuits.
A few of these traditions I do want to carry on, I want our own ones too. I have a few ideas like going to see the Christmas lights turned on, a trip to winter wonderland, making our own Christmas decorations and I love the idea of a Christmas eve box, filled with new pj’s, a Christmas film to watch ect and spending it with family I think is the most important one of all.
I would love to hear if anyone else has a any Christmas traditions – old or new
Before the arrival of Moonpie there was only one true love of my life – Art, it was my absolute passion and the only thing I was remotely good at.
I ate, slept and breathed it, not just making it but looking at other artists work, talking about it with others ect. I went to unversity and studied Animation in the hopes of becoming and animator or background artist but unfortunately it’s an extremely hard business to break through in and after a year and a half of rejection I put that dream on the back burner and took a job in a super market.
However I decided to continue to create my artwork and started a small business on the side – Megan Kate Art, it was relatively successful and I sold my work on seveal sites.
But in 2013 my depression reared it’s ugly head, I left my job and stopped all together with my art for a time.
Eventually i was encouraged to take it up again , it was the only thing that made me truly happy, no matter what was going on I could put all my energy into my work and create pieces I was really proud of. So in 2014 I decided to focus everything I had into making Megan Kate Art a big success.
Then the huge surprise of Moonpie happened… I carried on throughout my pregnancy but once she arrived there was just no time and I was too exhausted.
The dream is now to pick it back up once Moonpie is older but only part time, I still want to be an artist but art isn’t the only love I have anymore, being a mum will always come first, my little girl is my main true love now
I’m at my wits end this morning, another tooth is emerging so we have an extremely irritable Moonpie. Nothing I have done has been right so far today and has been received with screaming and biting (me and herself) … it’s driving me nuts ! !
I absolutely dread when she has another tooth break through, especially if it’s a top tooth, they seem to be the worst. I’ve tried everything calpol, nurofen, teething gel, powder, rings … you get the idea. But nothing really works fantastically apart from the teething powder but it’s a little pricey and I’m on a very tight budget.
Luckily she’s not waking up at night because of it (yet) so we are getting our sleep but during the day she’s having spells of constant crying and screaming, it was so bad this morning that after I put her down for a nap I knocked next door and apologised for the noise (she’d been on and off since 6 ) luckily they were very understanding but I still felt awful that they were disturb by us.
The sooner teething is over and done with the better, it’s just miserable for both of us